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Friday, May 11, 2012

Mother's Day

I remember Mother's Day when I was a dad and I would go to the store and pick out the prefect gift for my mom.  When I was little it was like a  treat to go shopping with my dad especially cuz I could always convince him to buy me something too...most of the time it was a stuffed animal of sorts.  As I got older he took me cuz I had a better idea of what my mom would like or what size she would wear.  It was nice cuz I got to spend the day with my dad...and, I could still always convince him to buy me a little something too. :)  My dad has had a few strokes now and isn't the man he used to be but I remember the last time he and I went shopping for my mom after I was married to the husband.  My dad told me one day it would be my husband and child going shopping for me for Mother's Day.......(he also mentioned that he would let husband know that anything for the house, that is used for cleaning, or cooking is not a good present.)

I think Mother's Day is definitely the hardest day of the year for us infertiles, especially since FaceBook was invented.  Who wants to log on and see a bunch of Happy Mother's Day comments when its the one thing in the world that you want more than anything but also the one thing in the world that seems just out of your reach???  Deffinitly not me.  I think thats probably why I have hidden 99% of all of the people whom I am friends with that are either pregnant or have a kid under the age of 8.

Husband and I have been TTC for 3 years this June technically 35 months and 2 days as of today (but who's counting, right??).  That makes this my 3rd Mother's Day with empty arms.  The first two were very hard but I expect this one to be even harder.  I should be 37 weeks today......I should be getting ready to meet our daughter in only 20 days....instead I have an empty nursery and empty arms.

These are two poems about Mother's Day for Mothers who's children are in Heaven that Id like to share...

It's the busiest day in Heaven
I'm planning a big surprise
To let you know I love you
And that no one ever dies

Even though your down below
And I am up above
I'm sending you my wishes
And all my angel love

It's really quite exciting
To plan this big event
For lots of gifts will come your way
And all are Heaven sent

First I'll take a bubble bath-
My splashes might cause some rain
But knowing all the fun I'm having
Will help to ease your pain

Next I'll get some pictures
In my halo and gown
So when you get to Heaven
You can show me all around

I have color crayons in Heaven
And I will draw some stars so bright
And place them in the sky today
For you to see tonight

Then Jesus will have story time
And I will sit upon his lap
He'll tell me all about you
Just before I nap

I'll awake full of energy
And play a game or two
Before I finish sending
All my love to you

After snack I'll write a song
For all the birds to sing
And know I've made you happy
With all the joy it brings

At night time I'll be tired
But I'll still hold you tight
My arms will wrap around you
And keep you through the night

And when you finally slumber
I will kneel and pray
Asking God to bless you
On this special Mothers Day

Your Little Angel


Dear Mr. Hallmark,

I am writing to you from Heaven,
And though it must appear
A rather strange idea,
I see everything from here.
I just popped in to visit,
Your stores to find a card
A card of love for my mother,
As this day for her is hard.
There must be some mistake I thought,
Every card you could imagine
Except I could not find a card,
From a child who lives in Heaven.
She is still a mother too,
No matter where I reside
I had to leave, she understands,
But oh the tears she's cried.
I thought that if I wrote you,
That you would come to know
That though I live in Heaven now,
I still love my mother so.
She talks with me, and dreams with me;
We still share laughter too,
Memories our way of speaking now,
Would you see what you could do?
My mother carries me in her heart,
Her tears she hides from sight.
She writes poems to honor me,
Sometimes far into the night
She plants flowers in my garden,
There my living memory dwells
She writes to other grieving parents,
Trying to ease their pain as well.
So you see Mr. Hallmark,
Though I no longer live on earth
I must find a way,
To remind her of her wondrous worth.
She needs to be honored,
And remembered too
Just as the children of earth will do.
Thank you Mr. Hallmark,
I know you'll do your best
I have done all I can do;
To you I'll leave the rest.
Find a way to tell her,
How much she means to me
Until I can do it for myself,
When she joins me in eternity.

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